Happy Solstice, pagan loners!

I have a real treat for you today. I discovered some ancient comics I drew when I was ten. It’s a short series documenting my bitter clash with the villainess “Katy S.” Allow me to set the scene: Throughout all of elementary school I was in love with Brian. He was a star student, and exceptionally handsome for his age:

Brian was certainly aware of my feelings- I stared at him ceaselessly, and dedicated all my art to him in art class. But he was very quiet and studious, and never made any official statement regarding my obvious love for him. He played it pretty cool, this guy! Nevertheless, for six years my ardor never wavered.

BUT THEN in 5th grade there was a new girl named Katy (who is now a news anchor!). Previously, I had eviscerated any other girl who foolishly ventured to crush upon Brian. But Katy could not be stopped! Not only did she refuse to acknowledge my prior claim on Brian, she also treated me with such “niceness” as to confound my attempts to vilify her. Most of my friends were on Katy’s side, or maturely refused to get involved. I remember a particularly embarassing incident on the playground, in which I dramatically stormed past Katy’s crowd by the monkey bars, loudly declaring,
“Come on, GANG.”
I expected everyone to immediately follow me. (No one did.)

So begins our 5-part series. Tell me, does anyone else have a bitterly hated childhood enemy they’d like to lambast in the comments section? I invite you to do so! Release your bile upon us all!

your friend,

PS Stay tuned for a Special Announcement, plus news of what some of your fellow awesome loners are up to this summer.